Self-Care Is NOT Selfish
Last week I was asked how us moms can have me-time without feeling guilty or without our husbands feeling resentment. I think this is a common thing a lot of moms struggle with even though self-care is essential. Moms feel like we’re being selfish and taking away from our kids and our husbands when we spend time on ourselves.
In this week’s podcast, I turned to my twin Lauren Pace…a busy mom of two (soon to be three), homesteader, business owner and child behavior coach who I think has figured out guilt-free self-care.
IF YOU’RE NOT TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF THEN YOUR MISSED NEEDS WILL COME OUT ON YOUR CHILDREN, AND THAT’S WHEN THE ANGRY MOM HAPPENS.
1- Take advantage of babysitting time and fit in self-care.
You don’t just have to use a babysitter for work or running errands. Get your lashes done, work on projects, take a relaxing shower. Do what you need to do so you’re not too far stretched.
2- Utilize your resources to free-up time.
Trade kids with a neighbor. Use shopping apps to chop up errands. Think of what other resources you have to help.
3- Involve your kids in yours and your partner’s projects.
The resentment comes when we’ve been with the kids all day, and we expect our spouses to come relieve us, but they don’t.
Instead of expecting each other to take turns with the kids, involve your kids in your projects and activities so that you and your spouse can have their time too. It’s all about giving, taking and reciprocating. Not expecting or assuming.
RECOGNIZE THAT SELF-CARE IS JUST AS MUCH FOR YOUR CHILDREN AS IT IS FOR YOU.
4- Your spouse has had a busy day at work as well, be aware of their busy day.
When your cup is full and you feel your needs are met, step it up a little so you can give your partner a break. You can fill their cup by doing sneaky acts of service that they will appreciate and return in the future.
ULTIMATELY, YORU SELF-CARE IS IN YOUR OWN HANDS AND YOU MUST TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR OWN SELF-CARE.
5- Don’t judge.
It’s important to realize that none of us are perfect. It’s more important to repair ourselves after we mess up than never mess up at all. Let’s just be our best, be kind and less judgmental to other moms.