Pushing through the BlocksAbout six years ago, I thought I made it in my business.
I was growing my team, getting inquiries, filling up my calendar with shoots. I was in a place where I felt like I was finally successful. Awesome. But a few months into this success, I crashed. Why? Because I had not built a stable foundation for myself. Even though I was “making it” financially, I was wobbly.
When somebody criticized my business, I would get fanatic and paranoid that I wasn’t good enough.
I doubted myself, my own abilities and my purpose. I was riddled with limiting beliefs. Not a good place to be, so that success I was having really didn’t mean anything. Eventually I started this emotional journey to repair my confidence. I invested in books, coaches and classes to learn new tools to release my doubt and the negativity in my life.
I began the hard work to control my mindset and push past big fears that were keeping me from growing into my business. With all the new tools I learned, I was able to grow my income from $5000 a month to consistent six-figure months. I let go of other people’s judgments and thoughts and it was so freeing. Even though people would vocally express doubt in my business ideas, I could go forward with full confidence because I was in control of my mindset. I was blocking out those limiting beliefs.
Our own limiting beliefs are 95% of most of the issues in our businesses.
If we feel we’re not successful enough due to not enough followers or income or clients, or if we feel like we’re doing everything we can, investing in courses and workshops, and still feel we’re not going anywhere, it’s likely because of limiting beliefs that we don’t even know are there!
Now you’re probably like, “wait, Kylee, I’m not sure I totally get what a limiting belief is.”
Put simply: limiting beliefs are fears and doubts that prevent us from going after big dreams. They take away our power and they are acquired over time. Like I said before, sometimes we don’t even know they’re there. The key is to recognize them and reframe them.
Today I’m going to talk about my magic formula for pushing through the blocks keeping you from success. And when we let go of all that negativity, it’s not longer a struggle to balance work and family or to live in abundance. Pushing through my limiting beliefs gave me the control to let go of mom guilt, trust my gut and lean into what God wanted me to do. And pushing through your limiting beliefs can do the same for you. I know it!
After months of coaching women in business, I learned that it wasn’t incorrect marketing techniques or social media strategies that were holding women back from success, it was their limiting beliefs. So I have developed a framework to coach other moms in business based on the tools and systems used to get aligned:
4 R Formula:
R – Recognize. What is a problem you’re experiencing right now? What’s stopping you? What is it, what’s the root of it? Feel all those things.
R – Reframe. Is it true? Where does this fear come from? Ask questions to challenge it.
R – Reaffirm. What is true or what do you want to be true? Change that false truth to what you want to be true. We have to tell our brain the truth or we will keep doubting ourselves. Be specific.
R – Replace. Replace that fear or doubt with a new skill. We can prove that our doubts aren’t true by getting training in a new area.
“I can’t be successful because I only have 500 instagram followers.”
Let’s reframe that statement. Is it really true that more followers equals more success? No. Followers do not equal money. There are people out there with 150 followers and they’re killing it on Etsy.
So instead let’s reaffirm, take that negative and turn it into a positive with what’s true. Something like…“I can be extremely successful with ____ followers.”
Last step is to replace what we feel we’re lacking. Let’s maybe learn how to be successful without relying on Instagram. Learn new skills or get a new business management tool.
“I don’t have enough time in a day.”
Is that true? No. If you’re spending your whole day cleaning, why don’t we outsource some of that so we can make more time for your business. Reframe, reaffirm and replace. Goodbye negative mindset.
“I have a lot of dreams but I want to wait until my kids are older.”
What’s the fear here?
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be a stay-at-home mom. If you have a dream and big goals, you can do it. It will give your family amazing opportunities. So we told ourselves that statement’s not true so now let’s reaffirm. “I can be an amazing mother while running a business.” And we can replace it with a new skill, maybe research workshops that help moms be a mom and a business owner.
I want you to know that you probably already have all most tools you need to grow your business. You don’t need to go out and chase after self-help books or new classes, you just need to get out of your head.