Mom guilt is something I talk about on the podcast a lot. And that’s probably an understatement because I talk about it more than a lot.
But I do it because it’s never going to stop being important! Mom guilt just keeps coming back up and I’m going to keep talking about it until you can learn how to get rid of mom guilt. It swirls around in your head, holding you back because you think you can’t be an amazing mom and business owner at the same time.
You can still be a bad-a**, boss mama in whatever capacity you want for yourself, and keep your family a priority.
You can do both! So if you haven’t heard yet, I created handy workbook a little bit ago called the Mompreuner Guide. I’m just really feeling like diving into that today because it is literally the guide to rooting out mom guilt. And if you have the guide, or get it at some point, it will all make sense because you’ll be able to understand the reasoning behind it.
Everything starts in your mind
When you go into a day you’re dreading with all the negative, hot mess-mom talk, those thoughts can be super sabotaging. They hijack your potential for a rewarding and fulfilling day, no matter the circumstances. There’s so many different versions of negative self-talk. Whatever yours is, you need to let go of it!
Attract the good with affirmations
To get rid of mom guilt, brain dump all of those negative thoughts on paper. Let it all come out and don’t hold back. After you get it all out, you want to replace it with affirmations.
Affirmations are positive statements that can help you challenge or overcome those self sabotaging or negative thoughts that are whirling around your head all the time. They’re little nuggets of positive declarations that help your brain believe a new story and help you attract opportunities to have a new life.
Any time negativity seeps in, repeat affirmations. I even put them on my mirror and set them as my phone’s screen saver so I can see them often. This simple process is the start to get rid of mom guilt!
So how do you create affirmations that are specific to you? Take things you’re struggling with and create a positive statement that is the exact opposite.
Find time for yourself
Right now you aren’t going to be able to go all in on your passions and hobbies. You’re a fulltime mom and fulltime business owner. But still keep your passions and hobbies alive. I’ve seen moms go all in on their kids and put everything else on hold. Eventually their kids leave and they don’t know what to do with themselves. Just because most of what you’re doing is for the kids, doesn’t mean everything you do has to be for the kids. Remembering that will help to get rid of the mom guilt you feel from time to time.
When I go skiing with my kids, a lot of the time is focused on them and running to the lodge and bathroom breaks and helping with goggles. I don’t get a lot of time to ski myself, but after the kids have had their fun, I still make sure to go out there and do a few runs because I need to have some fun skiing time too. I mean, I still want to be a good skier when my kids are old and don’t need me anymore. So I just take a few minutes for myself.
Use a schedule
Most of the time, if mom guilt is swirling around, it’s because you’re scattered or not present. So I added this handy calendar to the workbook that you can use to make sure you focus on one thing each day in all the categories of mom boss life. This is not a calendar for scheduling activities or appointments, it’s just for making sure you focus on yourself and your kids everyday.
The calendar is going to give you five categories: yourself, work, your house, kids and family. You get to choose one intentional thing you can do in each category every day. This will help you feel more fulfilled, more present and will get rid of that mom guilt!
Some things to remember
Know that your kids are yours for a reason. What you have, is what they need. There are so many ways to parent kids. Sooooo many ways it’s just so overwhelming. You can’t let someone’s really strong opinion towards how you parent your kids change you from listening to your own intuition. You are the perfect mom for your kids, and you have intuition on your side to guide you to making the perfect choices for your kids.
And remember that mistakes are not bad for your kids. They’re opportunities for your kids to learn and grow. You’re giving them all sorts of learning opportunities when you have a bad mom moment and mess up. Of course apologize and try better, but don’t beat yourself up.
Mama, I promise you’re doing better than you think you are and you are learning the lessons you need. Your kids are too! Teach your babies you can reach for the stars by being that amazing example for them!